Sunday, December 26, 2010

Chi Chi Badman Pt. 2

Clearly, Jamaica has a growing culture of latent homosexuals of both male and female. They outwardly seek the company of the same sex, however, due to fear of societal rejection and or the promise of violence they never fully embark in an out of the closet gay relationship. Instead they opt for a more socially accepted version. Therefore, women embark in relationships with men who act and dress in a more female manner. Outwardly the ‘men’ are very in-tuned with their femininity (in the wrong way), they display very ‘delicate’ mannerisms and do everything from bleaching, eyebrow arching and even forgoing male scents opting instead for a flowery perfume instead of a woody male cologne. To fill the void women tend to take a more dominant role and while they may still dress like females their roles have now become that of protector and provider in the relationship. Financially, emotionally and at times physically they do everything in the relationship that the quintessential male figure should do, including but not limited to providing money, directly or indirectly to buy bleaching cream and Clarks and/or walking on the outside during their strolls a position usually only occupied by a true gentleman. Essentially perpetuating a ‘Mine mi fe wine mi’ culture. Something once only a certain class of females would have the audacity to admit to. But instead now songs like Clarks II Vybz Kartel proudly states;
“Gal a mine mi fi wine me she love me off,
She say she a go a town she mi say bring mi Clarks,
She say wah kinda style yu wah,
Me say bring it inna suede, leather every material fi de Boss.”

No doubt women play a destructively encouraging roll in the Chi Chi Bad man phenomena. When before the effeminate boy especially in inner-city communities would be ridiculed and at times ostracized for acting/talking like a sissy now he now has a place in the company of older women who enjoy the company of a young Shebada. They cajole and encourage these boys to act more outrageously, they discuss in the presence of these children their adult/sexual relationships and instead of a functioning adult-child relationship the boys are treated as girlfriends and provide comic relief for these older women, providing the punch line for very explicit situations. Eventually they learn to beg, either implicitly by imitating actions of the elder female or explicitly being told to do so. Thus, begins the erosion as without a real male figure to instill such values as real men work, they protect and provide for their families, these boys eventually learn the hard way there is no such thing as a free ride when they beg the wrong men.

For the uninitiated the Dancehall video light is more than just an avenue to ‘big up’ oneself and friends, it is more than just a catalog of a hype party. A video light especially one from a very well known party is a market of the flesh. Long before e-harmony and the video light acted as a community notice board advertising the best and ‘baddest’ a particular subculture had to offer. Dressed in the finest and dancing in very sexually suggestive ways is a means for one not only to cement one’s place in this subculture but also acts as a means for a ‘big man’ to see a hot girl and say ‘a who da girl deh she bad eeh.’ This may eventually lead to him knowing this girl in a more biblical sense. Therefore, one can understand why some players in this culture would bitterly oppose wasted hours of important video time spent on peacocks. Essentially the culture that sprang up of male dancers; they act in an identical manner to the women they ‘model’ and brag and big up friends and their sexual prowess. And in some cases they beg more than any woman ever could. Where the conflict arise is these Chi Chi bad boys some posing as dancers will muscle out women from the Video Light. In theory these Chi Chi Bad boys compete for the same spoils and have no qualms reminding females that in comparison to what they have to offer a pussy has no value.

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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

The Jamaica Blog Awards

Hey yow Ima let you finish reading, but The Phoenix in a Gas House is the Best Personal Blog of All Time !^_^
If you love me and love the blog please don't turn me into the Jamaican Kanye West at the upcoming Jamaica Blog Awards. Don't make have to grab the mic and be a douchebag, So vote  and save me from doing something crazy.

Or worst I will start stealing. Please don't make me angry steal crap ^_^ Just vote for The Phoenix in a Gas House for Best Personal Blog.

Jamaica Blog Awards

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Chi Chi Badman Pt. 1

Some days I feel like Rip Van Winkle. I fell asleep for too long and woke up in a strange time warp where nothing makes sense. To be honest I feel like that old man shaking his fist saying,
I'm not saying these men are gay

“Hey you crazy kids turn that garbage off and pull your pants up!”
There is this phenomena set to music by Beenie Man and further defined by Dr Imani Tafari-Ama [Blood Bullets and Bodies: Sexual Politics Below Jamaica's Poverty Line, 2006, Chapter 6, pages 219-220] that I grossly need help understanding. That is, the phenomena of the Chi Chi Badman. Tafari-Ama states;

“In most every way, these Chi Chi Bad Men or bad Chi Chi Men are the ultimate binary opposition to emerge from the concrete jungles of Kingston’s urban slums… No sociologist was able to predict that the product of the most violently antagonistic and consistently anti-homosexual discourse in the ghetto- the bad boy gunmen- who are supposedly the very antithesis of anything queer, gay or funny, would suddenly and voluntarily switch their sexual orientation to become the very kind of persons that they had previously hated so passionately- batty men.”
“In effect, they have become lower class male prostitutes who service upper class gay men for top dollars.”

Usually the inner-city male is seen as the epitome of the Jamaican version of the macho man. Further more there is on other group in Jamaica so vehemently intolerant and opposed to the homosexual lifestyle than that of the Jamaican Shotter/Inner-city male. If you still subscribe the ideal male figure projected in songs from independence to present he is a very strong classically masculine figure constantly facing and overcoming the pressures of being male and underclass. Therefore, the phenomenon of the effeminate badman is an unforeseen paradox of our time. One is very amazed when observing these “men”; bleached faced, very arched eyebrows dressed in pastels that the girliest girl gravitates to because it totally expresses femininity.

If you have a penis then pink is the wrong colour for you

Not to mention the very close fitting female jeans worn strategically below the rump by these men. It gives the feeling of an advertisement of easy access rather than to convey the notion of strong, hard male protector. While generally the idea of a homosexual male is usually that of a tame, fragile, extravagantly flamboyant, RuPaul- esque male, however, today this is definitely not the case with the Chi Chi Badman and no better description could be found than that postulated by Ama in which she states;

“Make no mistake about it. These new inner-city Chi Chi Boys are not your ordinary tame and domesticated/sophisticated kind of homosexuals. These are not the poor, defenseless and victimized Jamaican homos whose cause the British gay group Outrage! likes to champion. No, these Badman Chi Chi Boys are tough young killers who can defend themselves and who will not hesitate to shoot or cut up anyone trying to criticize or mock them for their decision to embrace this still distained lifestyle.”

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Sunday, December 12, 2010

2010 National Biennial

Today was the opening of the National Biennial Exhibition. It will run from December to March and features eighty (80) artist, thirty (30) were invited while the others gained their place through a jury system.

The fifth edition of the biennial was pretty much a snooze fest. It was hard to hear the guest speaker Ms. Kay Osborne, which in this case might have been a good thing as the bits and pieces that you did hear were pretty boring. 

Guest Speaker Kay Osborne in front of work by Phillip Thomas

As opening art shows go especially in Jamaica, it was much of the same. There was so much social masturbation and hand jobs going on, thank goodness the quality of work being shown was so potent to cut through the stink of social climbing. 

L to R: Veerle Poupey, Joseph A. Matalon, David Boxer

David Boxer

"I was the Guest Speaker at the National Gallery and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt."

In spite of  the first day foolishness there are so many great Jamaican artists and I was happy to see so many great works in one place at one time. Some I particularly liked were from Kemar Swaby Hands of the Beholder (Mixed Media), Sekani (Akindele Hickling) The Valiant Warrior, Khalfani Ra Paradise or Tasmanian Devil The Great Taboo(Wax Acrylic on Bible Pages). 

Jody Ann Macmillan- Made in Jamaica (oil on canvas)

Marlon James

Marlon James- Janus (Digital Print)

Raymond Watson

Raymond Watson- Rhythm (Stone Resin Steel)

Omari Ra
In many societies art galleries tend to be seen as being an intimidating place Jamaica is no different, however I do hope you all take the step and go see the show. Find out more about the artists you like and MOST IMPORTANTLY. BUY THE WORK FROM ARTISTS YOU LIKE.  I don't know why people think artist survive on love and weed, they need cash too. 

Gene Pearson, O.D.

Gene Pearson, O.D. - Blue Mountain (Raku, Height 59cm)


Saturday, December 11, 2010

When Kartel Did Black

To quote Marcus Garvey or any other black leader who had a positive opinion on black skin would be an utter waste. I never understood Bleaching, I can't understand how this is an actual phenomena in the same place that gave birth to Marcus Garvey. The main thing I don't get is some Bleachers will never admit that that is in fact what is being done. Opting for euphemisms such as "rub" and "tone". Bleaching Lord Kartel said his metamorphosis happened by using only cake soap(washing soap) and sitting in air conditioned rooms all day. One thing that I will always love about the internet is its full of information. So here is a bit of information for anyone who happens to be a true friend of Kartel to remind him that he is supposed to be black.





Its so bad he has his own soap

Freak in the Dancehall
Who murder the Music
A Silly Monday Post
Lisa Hype's Oral Exam

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Bhutu in a Benz

Remember when Rex said a Bhutu in a Benz is still a bhutu? I believe at the time his reference was to the many Informal Commercial Importers (ICI’s) or Hagglers who displayed the usual characteristics of new money. That is the intense concentration on flash and showing a very Kitsch idea of opulence with the trinkets that their money affords. Except the class and refinement that these trinkets were suppose to show was woefully missing. No doubt that there has been and continue to be a mass erosion of manners and what one would think to be common sense etiquette extended to each other daily (maybe it had something to do with Elephant man moving up on the hill). And there is also no debating that money cannot buy you common sense, good judgment or refinement, just ask Vybz Kartel. I believe there is a mass conspiracy of ‘Bhutufication’ of the population as thought up and executed by the so-called Jamaican academia and jokers that pass for politicians done as a means of social control and perpetuation of the ‘Us vs. Them’ mentality so rampant in this Jamaican post-colonial society.

Unfortunately, as with every ill thought out plan by weak minds the blow back was/is reminiscent of a synthetic outbreak intended to harm and/or control only one set group. However, they tend to infect indiscriminately. The result is the bhutification of the nation. So dramatic and invasive is this disease that not even the nice uptown Brownings were to survive the Bhutu epidemic. The recent Babyface concert held at the National Indoor Arena brought to light the Bhuturized uptown practices that seem now ingrained in the culture like darkness does for cockroaches. For most parties the VIP section conjures images of velvet ropes and exclusivity. The very meaning of the abbreviation Very Important People oozes opulence and rareness and the impression of intimacy with the performers that could never be garnered by those who occupy the cheap-ass nose bleed seats. Very Important Behinds are seated comfortably here and the rest of you poor bastards should be overflowing with jealousy.

Unfortunately this is not the case with a great majority of these Jamaican events the money spent on procuring a VIP ticket one would gain greater value and satisfaction using said money to wipe ones ass and watch it being flushed down the toilet. This was the feeling I got from the recent Diana King /Babyface show. This was infinitely sad, as the lineup was not the normal ‘Buff Baff’ rabble of Vybz Kartel and Bounty Killer therefore; the expected experience was somewhat different. I have seen the glowing reviews of the show from different media houses and I wonder was this the same event or what? Jamaicans have always been blamed for poor customer service practices and the Jamaican show promoter heads the list of persons oblivious to the term customer delight.

The old adage “You get what you pay for” is an insult for those who forked out big bucks for the so-called VIP access to this and many other stage shows (usually in my case I get robbed twice or even thrice as I never learn my lesson and go alone to the so called VIP). For example, the $6500 spent at the Babyface concert gets you entry into the acoustic nightmare that is the National Indoor Sports Arena (a Turnkey Productions event). Yes I am sure there are ways to circumvent the awful sound that one would get from a huge echo friendly space with hard walls and seats meaning, the sound would constantly bounce back however, the sound technician (and I use technician very loosely) must have been a recent graduate as the sound for the night for all performances was so harsh and offensive to the ears.
For an event billed for couples one would think the hidden agenda was for said couples to go home and have sex. The d├ęcor if you can call it that went in another direction. There was no romantically draped fabric anywhere, nothing to suggest love or even lust. It was so bad that my Louis Vuitton Don had to ask,
“Eve honey is this a joke or did you take me to a children’s party?”
The god awful white plastic lawn chairs that no one thought of putting a cheap slip cover over to create some kind of different ambiance not to mention the hard ass stadium benches no one though to put cushions on after all it WAS V.I.P. There was nothing inclusive in the so called VIP access so patrons had the pleasure of buying refreshments and being served in the very very very did I mention very cheap plastic cups and cocktail plates the cheap ones not the Chinet or Dixie ones.

By no means am I picking on the promoters the Babyface/Diana King show that was supposed to be some sort of charity venture. But in truth it would have been better served if the donation was sent directly to the United Way instead of wasting it on the so-called VIP tickets. There are other false VIP offenders including yearly staples such as Reggae Sumfest now that VIP is a joke at best and a pigpen for you to wallow in on not so sunny days. Now there is so much buzz all over the social media about the upcoming Jazz and Blues Festival for the 23-29th January 2011. Yes I am going because I think I might try to rape that lead singer for Maroon 5 so far the confirmed headline act. Let’s hope Turn Key Promotions don’t fuck up VIP for Jazz and Blues 2011.

A Legend Only in the Mind
Quarter Century of Cloth
Freak in Dancehall